What is a "FrogMan"??? :)

[dive doc]

There’s a FORCE RECON guy, an SF (Special Forces; Army) guy, and a FROGMAN. Each was placed in their own dark circular room, where nothing can get in or out. All of them were given two slick, shiny, unbreakable, hard titanium balls. As each of them was placed into their respective rooms, a group of scientists began to peer into a small window on each room’s door:


Room # 1:

The FORCE RECON guy was working out with the titanium balls, grunting and yelling, “OOH-RA!” The scientists glanced at one another and commented, “Wow! This is great! He’s utilizing his time and resources to get fit and strong!”


Room # 2:

The SF guy was balancing each titanium ball on top of the other and directing what little light he had in the room to enhance his environment and keep his mind sharp. The scientists glanced at one another and commented, “Wow! This is great! He’s utilizing his time and resources to better his mind and conditions!”


Room # 3:

As the scientists peered into this room, they gasped and noticed the FROGMAN sitting naked in the center of the room, his clothes…nowhere to be found, one titanium ball…nowhere to be found, and the other ball…broke in half! The scientists then glanced at one another and commented, “TEAMS ‘n ****!”

[OddBall]

.......So they built room #4...placed the same two objects inside...filled the room to the top of the door with water...when the scientists peered inside...the balls were floating....I was inside swimming in circles at the bottom...they glanced at one another and commented...wow, that`s Odd !!

[oldswabbie]

Now that was funny, you turned that one right around Odd...Ball.. :D

[dive doc]

.......So they built room #4...placed the same two objects inside...filled the room to the top of the door with water...when the scientists peered inside...the balls were floating....I was inside swimming in circles at the bottom...they glanced at one another and commented...wow, that`s Odd !!

Then WarCom granted the first "OddNess" waiver for BUD/S and threw your *** in the CTT!!! :D

HooYah

[OddBall]

.........Now that would be fun to see.....so the scientists headed for CTT

They watched as they surrounded him with handguns and shivies,...while OddBall stood there with fear fill`n his skivies,..
He looked to the left and he looked to the right,....he knew he had to get out of this fight,...
Stand back, he said,...cuz I defeat all,....a few seconds later,....he was a human MeatBall
That knight at the table, while one began to pray,....MeatBall was watching in a most suspicious way,....
So he rolled onto the table, and down to the floor,....then the human MeatBall rolled right out the door,....onto the sidewalk then out in the street,.....now that damn MeatBall was no good to eat,....
The first knight was over with no end in site,....But OddBall had made it ....threw the first knight !!

[dive doc]

At least you know youll probably be ok with the much feared poetry and rhyming pass/fail evolution in first phase :D .... as for the rest ... get back training!!!!! :D LOL

[Shar36]

.........Now that would be fun to see.....so the scientists headed for CTT

They watched as they surrounded him with handguns and shivies,...while OddBall stood there with fear fill`n his skivies,..
He looked to the left and he looked to the right,....he knew he had to get out of this fight,...
Stand back, he said,...cuz I defeat all,....a few seconds later,....he was a human MeatBall
That knight at the table, while one began to pray,....MeatBall was watching in a most suspicious way,....
So he rolled onto the table, and down to the floor,....then the human MeatBall rolled right out the door,....onto the sidewalk then out in the street,.....now that damn MeatBall was no good to eat,....
The first knight was over with no end in site,....But OddBall had made it ....threw the first knight !!


OB...are you needing a username change to Meatball now? Nice post and glad to see you still have a way with words!

:D

~Shar

[OddBall]

........When the sun came up it was day number two,...and OddBall knew.....They were looking for you !!
They found him in the kitchen, hideing in the sause......Then dragged him to the beach, and hung him on a cross !!
Near the end of the day they came back after work.....to see if they got rid of this jerk !!
I`ve done this before, OddBall said.......then I came back when they thought I was dead !!
The scientists said Stop, the SEALs said apease us,....Then they explained that this man was Jesus !!
A SEAL said no he it not, his name is Odd,....then another one said, His fathers` not god !!
With the wave of his hand OdBall issued a Command,....then all the SEALs fell asleep in the sand !!
After the shock, OddBall looked up,....he saw the face of Jesus who said, Shut up !!
My Father said I could help you Today,....now hurry up, be on your way !!
With a little help from God, and Jesus too,...OddBall got threw day number two !!

[dive doc]

Can we move this to the general lounge so the rest of the guys can see this ... priceless :D

I put it in the wrong forum by accident and just realised most people cant see it. Its good for a laugh :P

So oddball ... what you are really trying to say is ... the Hierarchy goes something like ...

The Father, The Son, The Holy Ghost ... & The Teams ?????

Did hear somebody whisper in the depths of Hellweek ... that God is a Frogman???

[Shar36]

Can we move this to the general lounge so the rest of the guys can see this ... priceless :D

I put it in the wrong forum by accident and just realised most people cant see it. Its good for a laugh :P

So oddball ... what you are really trying to say is ... the Hierarchy goes something like ...

The Father, The Son, The Holy Ghost ... & The Teams ?????

Did hear somebody whisper in the depths of Hellweek ... that God is a Frogman???

You betcha!

~Shar

[OddBall]

.....Well doc,...I`ts lookin like that....


..........It was day three and the scientists couldn`t wait to see,...What the SEALs had planned for me !!
They heard one of them say, he gets away in the day,.....If we can`t get him in daylight, then we`ll get him at night !!
All threw the day, to my surprise,...I wasn`t ever bothered by none of the guys !!
After dinner we got in a car and drove around,...stopped at a field with a sign that read Private ground !!
Crossed over the field and stopped at the woods were I had to sit down,..I didn`t see anyone else around !!
You`re going in there , but not us too ,.....cuz we know who`s in there waiting for you !!
Over there in the woods, were it`s quiet and dark,....is the baddest Frog of all,...the one we call Shark !!
Then looked at his watch and said to begin,...so OddBall got up, and then he went in !!
After an hour of looking threw the bush and the trees,....a voice from the dark, told me to freeze !!
Couldn`t see who it was, cuz it was pretty dark,.......then he stood up say`n They call me Shark !!
It was Brave to come in, that choice that you made,.....I get the feel`n the others are afraid !!
Then he turned to the field yelling This is what I`ll do,........I`ll Leave OddBall alone, cuz I`m com`n for YOU !!
Well,... looking around going back to the barricks, it was easy to see,...... what the Sharkman had done, should have happened to me !!
I got back to my room , and as I closed the door,....I made it by day three,...but tommorrow there will be more !!:eek:

[jumpingbum]

Dive Doc? I must be really dense, but I don't get the joke, or rather I don't get the SEAL part of it... Sigh. If I were blonde, that would be one thing, but I'm not. :)

[huyah_dan18]

DD, I did not get it, either. But I really like Oddball's poetry.

Dan18

[Shar36]

You have to understand DD to get it. Although I had to ask myself and I have it on good authority that one needs to think along the lines of balls...Brass balls!

~Shar

[jumpingbum]

You have to understand DD to get it. Although I had to ask myself and I have it on good authority that one needs to think along the lines of balls...Brass balls!

~Shar

Brass Balls destroy titanium ones? And now it's not just because I'm having a blonde moment. It's because I had psychology class this afternoon... GASP I was on a college campus!!!!!!

[dive doc]

Its really gonna spoil it if i have to go and explain this one ...

"Unbreakable" titanium balls ... anyone?? No?? :(

[1stud]

The SEAL broke the "unbreakable" balls because. . . . SEALs do the IMPOSSIBLE!!

[dive doc]

All im gonna say is ... "Teams 'n' S**t" ... If you aint digging it ... Youre in the wrong pond :D

[OddBall]

Wait till they try to figure out me !!

.....Hey thanks Doc for gittin that OddNess waiver from WarCom for me, I just finised my fourth day here,......


............I woke up early this morning,....a little before the wake_up warning, some SEAL were paceing by my door,.........I knew what they were waiting for !!
So I grabbed the TP and headed for the latrine,...I was fake`n it, if ya know what I mean !!
When I didn`t come back,....they started their attack,.......but I had a small lead, and that`s all that I need !!
I ran around the corner of the barrick before they came out,...Wich way did he go?,...I heard one of them shout !!
With little time, I had to climb, back in the building to find some relief,.......that`s when I found a door that said.... Master Chief !!
While I looked at the door, the SEALs came down the same floor ......so I kicked and banged it really loud,...ran around the corner to get away from the crowd !!
When he came out and saw the SEALs run`n down the hall,.....they all stopped in their tracks when they heard the Chief call !!
So ya wanna play games and have some fun, bang on my door, turn around and run,....listen to me I got something to say,....I`m gonna make life real hard for you today !!
Then he marched them to the Grinder, on the double,.....not knowing it was OddBall that got them in trouble !!
I didn`t know the lay of the land, so I went over and burried myself in the sand,....I watched them suffer in pain,while the Chief stood there and watched them train,.....then I felt wet cuz it started to rain !!
I wanted to laugh, but if you make a soun they`ll find ya,....then a voice said get up boy,...I`m right behind ya !!
He brought me to get screamed and reamed by the boss,....but the Chief said hey, aren`t you the one from the cross? !!
I`m new here sir yep that`s me,....so he held out an umbrella and said you`ll hold this for me,....all day long the SEALs were cry`n, *****`n and complain`n,......While OddBall kept the Chief dry, cuz it was rain`n !!
When the Chief finished with them later that night, they crawled in the building,...too beat down to fight,......so day four was gone and I was still alive,...but not look`n forward to day number five !!

[ambassador1]

Wait till they try to figure out me !!!


Is that even possible?

[jumpingbum]

Its really gonna spoil it if i have to go and explain this one ...

"Unbreakable" titanium balls ... anyone?? No?? :(


Sorry, no. I understood that part. What I didn't understand was that there were TWO balls and one had disappeared... THAT got me lost.

[dive doc]

Sorry, no. I understood that part. What I didn't understand was that there were TWO balls and one had disappeared... THAT got me lost.

Sounds impossible right ??? Almost to the point, to where you say ... How the F*** did he do that !!!!! ;) :D

[insealshape]

I thought he sat on one:confused:

[OddBall]

.......'Humbled`...sounds like bumble, wich comes with bees !!.........


You`re neva gonna belive what happenned on day five,....

When I opened my eyes,what a surprise,.....I was surrounded by all of the guys`.....the Chief had the key that opened the door,....so they could come in and surround me once more !!
I was lay`n there too easy pick`n,...but the Chief wanted to roast some chicken...I had to be tar`d and feather`d and skewed outside,....so the Chief could roast me and get back his pride !!
They took me to the winter locker and pulled feathers out of each one`s parker, then we went to the roof to go get some tar,.....but the roof was concrete and covered with rubber,.....Since this way wont work, we`ll have to find another !!
Couldn`t get it at the hardware store, cuz we don`t use money,...then one of the scientists said,...you should use honey,.......we went to the kitchen and found two cans, then they took me out back and taped-up my hands......then covered me with honey from my feet to my face, and then put feathers all over the place !!
We went to a place that the Chief said he found, and already had a hole in the ground,...they collected firewood on the way, and while looking around I heard one of them say,...here it is the hole that I found......then they wanted to put the pole in the ground !!
So when one tried to put the pole in the ground, it seemed to get stuck about a foot down,....one said, Make sure it goes in deep,....That`s when tragedy struck in one big heep....when it wouldn`t go in, he wiggled it around, then he pulled it back out of the ground,........right from the begin`n, ......every bee came out sting`n !!
They went in their close and behind their glasses,...those bees were gonna kick all of our asses,....I stood there bound and in fear,... while they chased around all the guys`that were have`n a beer,...I was shake`n and sweat`n try`n not to make a sound,...watch`n the bees come up from the ground !!
They landed on me but didn`t sting or bite, something was odd and just wasn`t right....they protected me and groomed me as if to keep me alive,....These bees thought I was part of the hive,...so OddBall stood there, glad to be alive....smiled and waited for the Chief to arrive !!
When the Chief came for lunch he was expect`n chicken, not the pain of a thousand bees stick`n......his roast was in ruin, and all the guys` left `em,.... so he had no choice but to kiss my rectum,....Everywhere I went to today,..... people were nice and stayed out of my way....I even got to pick my own food and tray, cuz people were polite and did what I say !!
No-one would come into the barricks alright, so I was alone for the rest of the night,....I couldn`t lay down and I was in a fix,...so I watched TV and waited for day six !!

[OddBall]

....In the morning when the bees` went looking for pollen, I heard the wake-up warning call`n....we went to the beach to hear the Chief explain,...we would be in the water today to train !!
We would put a puzzle together on the bottom, in as little times needed comming up for air, Finally the boat brought us there and when my time came I wouldn`t dare,......the Chief said,..... You`re going down there !!
The guys were all laughing at me as I listened to him,.....None of them knew that OddBall can`t swim,....He wanted to cover my swimsuit with lead, to make sure I went to the propper seabed !!
I went straight down like I was at full throttle, Landed next to the puzzle and a strange looking bottle,....When I cleaned off the dirt, useing my hand, green smoke came out in the shape of a man !!
I wrote on my pad, don`t have time for you, very busy, I got something to do,......I wish I knew how, and could swim like a fish, the smoke said ....why don`t you just make a wish !!
In no time at all I was swimming around, the puzzle was done, thanks to the bottle I found,.....the smoke said what I asked was wish one and two, one wish is left that I owe to you !!
When I got to the top, I kew they wouldn`t believe it, when I showed them my new gills they were like, Oh sh*t,..... I said you helped me find it, and I`m one who stands tall, I`ll save the last wish tonight for us all !!
When we got back to base the Master Chief had a smile on his face, He might get promoted to some other place,......he was gonna try to get picked for Admiral out of a choice of three, then said goobye to everyone but me !!
After dinner going back to meet the guys`, I saw the Chief and wanted to say my goodbye`s, so I flagged him down and looked straight in his eyes,.......He said watch over the other guys, I shook his hand and wished him Good-luck, then he SMILED and drove away in his truck !!
I got to the barracks and called out the smoke, it didn`t work and I thought it was a joke....... I tried and tried but it just would`t be, the guys` were getting pissed at me,........By the end of the night I walked with a woddle, cuz my butt was filled with a strange looking bottle, ..........I didn`t care tommorrows` the last day of the week, we get to graduate and get up and speak !!

[OddBall]

..........I had to squeez with all my might, but I sh*t that lieing bottle out last night,....today I`d get to talk out loud, so I got up and went to join the crowd, they were all dressed-up heading over there,....I realized that I had nothing to wear !!
I went over in boots, cammo and a tee, did`nt care that everyones` looking at me,....we had alot of fun since my stay had begun, I wasn`t gonna quit and be the only one, ....I went over to sit with the other guys`, when I got there I couldn`t believe my eyes !!
The Chief was there and wearing new clothes,...these are the kind that everyone knows, He stood there as an Admiral while everyone stares, shiny pins and patches is what he now wares,....He said hey Odd how ya do, I couldn`t have done this if not for you,.....I didn`t know what he meant, nor` did I care too, then he lined us up and over we went !!
We wrote our speech and headed for the stage,... when the scientists said something that sent me up in a rage,....they pulled me to the side, over by a tree, then they said they couldn`t graduate me,......they told me the waiver that I got from Divedoc, had somehow made me jump the clock,....they said the couldn`t promote me, cuz the waiver had me skip over week three !!
As they tried to explain that week three was a time not a place, OddBall got right up in there face,....DON`T GIVE ME THAT SH*T BOY JUST POINT, I`LL MAKE MY OWN DAMN WAY TO THAT JOINT,......so feel`n like an athelete that just reached his peak........

OddBall went look`n for a place called Hell Week !!