i need advice!

[sealgf]

My boyfriend is planning to join the SEALs. We haven't talked about it much but so far, I've been as supportive as possible. I realize that it's going to be stressful and difficult on both of us and our relationship. What exactly should I expect as a SEAL girlfriend? How much will I get to see him after he's assigned to a team? How can I stay in touch with him?

[coronadodreamin]

I've some advice - Change our name. Your boyfriend is not yet a SEAL. But more to the point... If he does make it, you'll stay in contact with him as you would anyone else you don't see on a regular basis; emails, letters, phone calls, the occasional visit.

[imddrummer]

If he makes te teams, he will probably be in either California or Virginia, so it depends on where you live. Buds is in Coronado California, and lasts 6 months. That is where he will start his training to become a SEAL. If you want, you can go see him out there on some weekends.

[oldswabbie]

My boyfriend is planning to join the SEALs. We haven't talked about it much but so far, I've been as supportive as possible. I realize that it's going to be stressful and difficult on both of us and our relationship. What exactly should I expect as a SEAL girlfriend? How much will I get to see him after he's assigned to a team? How can I stay in touch with him?

There are some realities you are going to have to face. One of the biggest is the separation...but that goes with being in the Navy period. The other is the nature of his job (IF he makes it). SpecOps missions at the least are Secret, and most often Top Secret. IF (once again) he makes it and you get married, expect to be checked out by NIS. If you have anything in your past it could possibly affect him.

Because we are at war there could be times he may/may not be able to call you and say "I gotta go". You may not hear from him for quite awhile and you WILL NOT - SHOULD NOT ask him where he is. This is the nature of the job he wants to do.

Can you handle this? You must be perfectly honest with yourself and him. Please, be honest with him. He needs his head straight if he is going to get through the next year of training and then suceed in a Naval career and or Navy SEAL/SWCC etc. I got a "Dear John" letter about 2 months into my deployment to isolation duty - screwed me up for a little while. Dont do that to him in a war zone, it could cost him or his team members thier lives if his head isnt in the game.

Understand, not everyone is cut out to be a Navy Girlfriend, Wife. If you CAN handle this then be as supportive as you can and do what he asks - even if it doesnt make sense sometimes. There are also support groups of Navy wives which you can connect with to help.

I hope this helped.

My 2cents and Ill stow my Gear
OldSwabbie

[oldswabbie]

I've some advice - Change our name. Your boyfriend is not yet a SEAL. But more to the point... If he does make it, you'll stay in contact with him as you would anyone else you don't see on a regular basis; emails, letters, phone calls, the occasional visit.

She doesnt know the rules yet but yes a name change would be in order.

[itsallorganek]

by the way-- welcome aboard :D

[oldswabbie]

by the way-- welcome aboard :D

I second that. Feel free to ask questions. But first I would say use the search function above before posting as some of the questions you may ask have already been asked before (probably many times). There are quite a few Navy/SEAL/SWCC wife threads you can read up on too.

There are a great bunch of guys on here and very willing to share. I would also suggest going to the Main Forum and reading some of the "Rules and Regulations" on the forums. They will give you a good idea of what the site is all about.

Again, as itsallorganek said, Welcome Aboard.

My 2cents and ill Stow my Gear
OldSwabbie

[akrock2001]

While he's in BUD/S he should be able to talk to you everyday, minus one notoriously famous week which I can't think of the name right now and times when there are night evolutions, along with other times in other phases.

And as Mr. Swabbs stated, in Special Operations seperation is a part of life. Either you can deal with it, or you can't.

The first taste of seperation is going to be BUD/S. I spoke to my girlfriend, now EX-girlfriend, almost everyday trying to be the best boyfriend I could be while she attempted to screw every male in VA...:) Ahhhh yes, what a slut...

OK, enough rambling.

[oldswabbie]

While he's in BUD/S he should be able to talk to you everyday, minus one notoriously famous week which I can't think of the name right now and times when there are night evolutions, along with other times in other phases.

And as Mr. Swabbs stated, in Special Operations seperation is a part of life. Either you can deal with it, or you can't.

The first taste of seperation is going to be BUD/S. I spoke to my girlfriend, now EX-girlfriend, almost everyday trying to be the best boyfriend I could be while she attempted to screw every male in VA...:) Ahhhh yes, what a slut...

OK, enough rambling.

DOH! Sorry that happened Arock. Sucks to be sure. I got to my first duty station (isolated duty) and found out 2 month later that my fiance was seeing not one but 2 other guys. I started having some issues following BEQ regulations and the rights of other individuals (fighting). In bud/s, Jump, SERE, SQT the guy has GOT to have his head in the game... I dont have to tell you. Its hard enough without dealing with personal issues on top of the hell you are going through second by second. Not to mention completing SEAL training and going into combat and not thinking straight. Your life and your teammates lives are depending on YOUR eyes, ears and mind being sharp as a tack... again... preaching to the choir.

Its not just about GF/BF anymore at that point. The relationship then reaches into the team. I hope she understands that and the dept of the comittment and the danger.

Arock, did you complete training or still in training? Im still learning about everybody on here :)


My 2cents and Ill stow my Gear

OldSwabbie

[sealwife256]

While he's in BUD/S he should be able to talk to you everyday, minus one notoriously famous week which I can't think of the name right now and times when there are night evolutions, along with other times in other phases.

And as Mr. Swabbs stated, in Special Operations seperation is a part of life. Either you can deal with it, or you can't.

The first taste of seperation is going to be BUD/S. I spoke to my girlfriend, now EX-girlfriend, almost everyday trying to be the best boyfriend I could be while she attempted to screw every male in VA...:) Ahhhh yes, what a slut...

OK, enough rambling.

Wow, I'm sorry that's awful. You men willing to serve our country just remember that there ARE good women out there!

[oldswabbie]

Wow, I'm sorry that's awful. You men willing to serve our country just remember that there ARE good women out there!

I'm glad I found out about mine just like he was glad he found out too. It hurts but it sure saves you a H*** of alot of grief later on.

At least I can say I'm married to the most incredible lady now. She wouldnt have me in the Navy (back then) but that was a different time in my life.

Yes, not all girls are like that but it seems like some of us (akrock and I) found the wrong ones! DOH! :)

By the way - God Bless you and your husband. I pray each night for you guys.

[sealgf]

I'm sorry about the username issue! I didn't create this account myself actually. A friend of mine registered for me and I really didn't get much of a choice in my username. I'm not sure how to change it so if you know how to, can you help me?

By the way, I appreaciate all the advice! I took it all to deep consideration and thought! Thanks so much!

[Ambassador]

I'm sorry about the username issue! I didn't create this account myself actually. A friend of mine registered for me and I really didn't get much of a choice in my username. I'm not sure how to change it so if you know how to, can you help me?

By the way, I appreaciate all the advice! I took it all to deep consideration and thought! Thanks so much!

sealgf -- Send me an email at ambassador.nsc@gmail.com with the username you would like to change your account over to. I will make sure that it is corrected for you.

Ambassador

[oldswabbie]

By the way, I appreaciate all the advice! I took it all to deep consideration and thought! Thanks so much!

Its serious business we (this Country) is in these days. Your boyfriend has some serious decisions. Good luck to you both. Feel free to come back anytime for advice - thats why we are here.