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Kinnikinik
08-11-2005, 08:36 PM
I have not met a boat guy who does not have a funny story to tell about being on the boats. After a while, funny stuff just starts happening. So, share a sea story... or five.

Here's one of mine,

I was in Crete with my MKV Det enjoying the sun. We parked our boats in a lagoon next to where the Carriers would pull in. My OIC was a great guy, but he was a SWO, and not only that, but he was an ultra religeous, conservative type SWO. We would go running on the beach in Rhodes and he would put his hand up so that he wouldn't have to see all the topless women on the beach. Duh... thats why we were PTing there... anyway, the time came for me to reenlist. Well, I am not one for Pomp and Circumstance, but the LT was adamant that I could do whatever I wanted wherever I wanted, in whatever uniform I wanted for my reenlistment (for the record, as long as you submit the request and do the paperwork, you can reenlist just about wherever you want with whomever you want doing the job). Well, I said we would just do it simple and climb up on the canopy of the MKV and do it there.

He must have practiced the Oath of Enlistment for three days making sure he got it right. The day came and he was standing tall and proud on top of that MKV. Well, he had said I could do it however I wanted in whatever I wanted to wear. Well, I chose to wear a 2 inch by 4 inch strip of rag tied to my naked *** with a length of 550 cord. I have to give that guy credit. After the initial shock, he called the Detatchment to attention. It was a bit windy on top of the boat, so I had to be in a modified position. Namely, I had to hold that skimpy piece of fabric over my Johnson because the wind kept blowing it up. I raised my right hand and did my Oath right there, one hand in the air and the other holding down my loin cloth. The LT never missed a beat. I did get him when afterward I went to do the traditional wetting down from a nearby barge and made him look up at me while I climbed up the ladder. That couldn't have been pretty.

Anyway, that enlistment went pretty well... we'll see what I can think up for the next one.

skimmer
08-13-2005, 02:24 PM
A loin cloth!!!!

I would've re-enlisted amongst the topless women on the beach....

skimmer
08-13-2005, 03:09 PM
You really made me think about a few of my funniest times.....

Here's my contribution.....

I was still a probie or rookie (ok, that's being flowery) assigned to a RHIB Det out of San Diego.... Myself and one other boat was ordered to take a group of Marines (Marine Amphibious Recon) out to an island just off the coast.... Then hang around the area to practice a "hot" extract and transport these Marines to a PC that would be waiting, while conducting cover fire for us....

We grumbled to ourselves "Marines??? do they even know how to swim?" and comments like, "If one goes under, I ain't going in!" I think we even wondered if the Sailors on the PC knew how to shoot above us, and not at us....

We were making our way towards the island to drop off our package when we received a call over our radios.... "Where are you guys going?"..... It was the PC..... "Dropping off our package then rendevousing with you" was my reply..... "Change of orders..... report to us first...." so we went to the PC sitting about 10 miles to the Southwest of our local.....

We came alongside the ship and we asked why the change.... They decided they wanted it done after midnight which now included doing a "hot insert"..... that gave us roughly 4 hours to do...... nothing..

At 2345 we loaded the RHIB's fired them up and moved away from the ship..... At exactly 0000 we got the call.... "Release the hounds!" and we rolled those RHIB's at top speed toward the island.... 200 yds, I yelled "standby"....... 100 yds...... "Hard left!!" and I whipped the rudder left which put my RHIB in the strangest angle, where if I stuck my left arm straight out away from my side, I could made the boat turn sharper from the drag of my hand in the water.....

Then it happened, I was performing the sharpest left turn that boat has ever been into, I could feel the raw power of the engines, the smooth uninterupted drag.... when the feelings all disappeared... no drag, the engines now delivering an unearthly scream, and especially, there was now a new sense.... the feeling of levitation.... This was not going to be good.

The sense of levitation was quickly replaced by another feeling..... whiplash.... we started to again grip the water and the boat went from leaning over hard to the left to whiping over and was now leaning over hard to the right!..... As quickly as I could react, I straightened the boat and came back on the throttles...

Everyone with the exception of the navigator, had been tossed, actually catapulted out of the boat! The second boat which was off our port quarter at the time came alongside and asked me who was hurt.... "We're all good" was my quick and vibrating response... Except where was my boat officer? At the time of the "trip" he had just let go to help a Marine regain his balance when I catapulted everyone out.... I looked around only to find him about 50 feet away swimming towards me.... Swearing at me with every stroke and every kick....

All the Marines had been catapulted, they later came back to me and asked us to do that again.... all the while they were thinking that's how we ALWAYS do a hot insert.....

This was definately one of those times I wish we had a camera....

skimmer